(Free Read): Hate Begets Hate

A plea to break the cycle that ails us.

Note: We are deliberately taking a detour this week from The Monthly Lineup. Feel free to listen by clicking on the audio track above.

As with most things in my life, my work with Lighten Up happens on a schedule.

Specifically, this means that on every Thursday afternoon, I write.

But this past Thursday afternoon occurred the day after Wednesday, which was in no way an ordinary Wednesday in our country. It was a Wednesday during which the already precariously loose thread we were all hanging on by was tugged, prompting an unraveling that only underscored how torn we were in the first place.

So, on Thursday, when I sat down to write my intended post “The Magic Pill(s)” about nutrition, the words just did not come. At least those about the power of food did not.

But there were so many other thoughts.

I am sharing them here in full Lighten Up fashion – no paywall included – because as we’ve discussed before despair is one of the most influential emotions on our health.

And that is why this reflection has nothing to do with politics and absolutely everything to do with humanity.

Because we – individually and collectively – must actively define what it means to wake up.

For example: As news broke on Wednesday afternoon, I took to the place I visit most when seismic shifts are occurring: social media. And I do this not for fast-breaking news or to witness disturbingly graphic videos, but to observe how people are reacting.

Yes, as someone who is mesmerized by the patterns of human behavior, the comments, for me, are what it’s all about.

And good Lord, what a disgusting display of humanity they were.

Not in terms of who stood for what or who was defending – or bashing – whom, but rather the overall vernacular and discourse between living, breathing humans, furiously plummeting each other with their fingers through a screen.

There were expletives. Friendships ending in dramatic fashion in public view.

And through it all, there was a common refrain: What has become of us?

And it’s a question I cannot help but ask myself.

Because as I continued to swim deeper into the dark waters of those social interactions, I couldn’t help but think not of the lack of leadership — which was a serial complaint — but about the absence of common sense.

How can we not recognize that in order to heal what ails us, we must first break the pattern that has led to the disease?

How can we not understand that hate begets hate?

This is why after spending far too long on both Wednesday and Thursday feeling dirtied by the viral mudslinging, I found myself cleansing my heart by taking to my phone – for good.

I checked in with a couple of friends who had just brought new life into this world and received in return pictures of absolute innocence that served as the ultimate boomerang.

I sent a note to an employee acknowledging their recent streak of impeccable work, only strengthening our bond as a team.

And I hugged my husband hard when he got home before we had a long and challenging discussion about how we could improve upon our work/life balance before it’s too late.

This, Gang, is the antidote.

Not sweeping policy change or election overhauls, but basic kindness and human decency.

It’s certainly not a quick fix, but without it, we have no foundation.

No basis for listening or even considering other perspectives.

For realizing that our peace is an inside job.

This is why we’ve also discussed that when the good seems hard to come by, the solution is to create it.

To be it.

And not on conditional terms of agree with me or not.

So let’s be clear: Feeling powerless and not initiating change is simply a scapegoat for blaming those we feel are responsible.

If you’re going to comment about the need to wake up, you should first check that you’re doing so yourself.

Are you sipping on the poison? Or perhaps dolling it out?

Or are you actively treating our collective wounds by perpetuating tiny doses of good?

Up Next Week: We’ll resume with our focus on tidying up our internal house (complete with reflection points).

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